After a few years of doing yoga at home on and off to DVDs, I got up the guts to attend my first yoga class last week. While I'm not inflexible, I am unbelievably uncoordinated -- I have broken two bones in my lifetime by tripping, one of which occurred within the last year. Also, I do not have the yoga-y, flat-chested with a bubble-butt figure. Instead, I have a chest that gets in the way of everything, hips clearly meant for child-bearing and no discernible tuckus (as my husband lovingly calls it, including the "no discernible" part).
Tonight, 3 days after the first, was my second class. It is difficult; it is no wonder regular practitioners of it end up flat-chested bubble butts. In the middle of both classes, I was completely convinced that I would never do it again. But by the end of both, I wondered if it would be possible to go the next day, too.
After the first class, I could totally understand why the yoga-types also tend to be the possibly-vegan, all organic type people, as well. After I left the class, I felt like I understood my body. I could feel my quads screaming at me for overworking them, I could feel my body craving water -- no substitute, it HAD to be water -- and I wanted to go home and throw all the junk food in our house away. The first time, I wondered if this was from some sort of culture-immersion influence, but after tonight, I'm convinced it is just how in touch with your body you have to be during yoga that causes this reaction.
So far, I love it. I like the studio I found, I like the two teachers I've had. I like the buzzy feeling afterwards. I like the tingling in my recently-broken foot that feels so restorative. I like the quiet. I like the complete non-competitiveness of it all. I like the time away from my brain, and the anxiety relief it provides.
I was thinking tonight that I hope I stick with it, that I don't tend to stick with things. And then I thought, well, that's not really true. I quit drinking and never fell back. I started this blog 15 months ago and here I am. I'm going on three years without caffeine. I've been off gluten since September purely because of the positive reaction my body had to leaving it behind. Maybe the intensity of the wellness yoga makes me feel will be enough, just like the rest. We shall see.
No big revelation or rant today. I'm feeling well, and after last week, that's really all I want to say. I want to end this with a reading my yoga instructor read today just because I find it beautiful.
It is important in life to be constant. The ancients urged their students to look at the moon. It was faithful to its course. It was the center of the night sky. For thousands of years, children, women, and men looked up to it and found inspiration and wonder.
The moon keeps to its orbit. Silently. Unwaveringly. True, it has its phases. Its course, its movement, its path in life -- leads it into shadow and into brightness. Does it complain? Does it seek a different course? It does not.
Let the light that falls upon it change. Let its face sometimes be in shadow: The moon daily witnesses with its own body the play of shadow and light. It accepts that, and in so doing it uplifts all who see it.
The moon has its own primal power. It pulls on the earth; it pulls on the oceans and on the hearts and minds of human beings; it paces the seasons. The moon does not fight. It attacks no one. It does not worry. It does not try to crush others. It keeps to its course, but by its very nature, it gently influences. What other body could pull an entire ocean from shore to shore? The moon is faithful to its nature and its power is never diminished.
Look no further than tonight's sky if you would want to know how you can be true to yourself.
--Everyday Tao (edited slightly)
